98
Gould's bookshop
He gives a list of names around the world who might be able to help with the TripliKate thing
Adrian Cromwell in London
Last news of Black is he was looking for the Green Man - Pagan elemental
Dr Tarot in SF
Xo and Danny are at the museum
She encourages him to take a research assistant's job
Shock tells Bear about her new costume ideas
Megastar looks for weird island
Bear says Shock has weird DNA, even for a mutant
Later, he says the same about Xo and I
I go see Molly Midnite and suggest she get out of any business that hurts people before I cease to be busy
Daphne has a job with Mars
Still lodges with Shock's mother
Shadowy figure watches the museum at night
It's GRAB
Blue Jay is reputed to be a murderer but is really upset by the accusation
We take them down
They were hired by Lupo
He was the guy trying to kidnap Kris 70 issues ago
99
Megastar flying back from looking for the island
We plan our trip
Molly wants to find the Mysterious Island
Shock is being particularly Shockish
I go see Blue Jay
She did a couple of break and enters. Tangled with security guards
She says the guards panicked, hit gas mains and the like - she didn't kill them
Legally, she's still a murderer unless this happened in jurisdictions without felony murder rules
But I'll check into whether there is security footage - might at least give some moral defence
Molly and Bear look for the island
Moo-Vel girl has weird brainwaves
Lupo's computer records look legit
Shock sneaks in to look for paper trail
There isn't one
Molly Midnite may have info
"Don't break into his house"
All his written records are misdirection
Possible buyers: Bulldog Smith is most likely
We fly to the UK
"Grond will crush!"
100
We try to deal with Grond
Being us, we use pictures of bunny rabbits
And soothing cranial massage
Unleash the puppy dog eyes!
We talk him down in the end
AEGIS send him back to Antarctica for us
Molly stays to fix the ship
The rest of us go to the British Museum to meet Eldritch
Eldritch's master is Magus Adrian Cromwell, who I need to see
Also, Eldritch lives in the notTARDIS
Someone is trying to break into the museum
It is The New Le Coq's Legion
101
We fight the idiots
We secure the idiots
We need Cromwell to fix the museum
Shock's sensitivity training is showing again
She and Molly go out
Xo and I wait for AEGIS
Bulldog Smith was behind this raid
They were after the Eye of Set
We go to the Tower of London
Oh look, Spectral Bobby
102
Can't game. Satan jizz.
Shock and Molly invent a worse Mousetrap
Shock explains things. It goes about as well as you'd expect.
Magus Cromwell is doing Magus stuff
We organise samples of hair from the three Kates for analysis
Molly and Kris meet Danny
I help Xo come up with a (true) cover story
She goes to make things less awkward
Yeah ...
Something is missing from the museum
A Celtic knife - not known to be a major artefact
Cromwell fixes the tower
Cromwell: Eldritch speaking in tongues when she touches me is "to be expected" and will always happen
Says my powers stem from angelic possession
"Moo-Vel's a Holy Cow"
103
Blue Jay has never operated in the UK
Shock wants to go to Madame Tussaud's. No-one else does so she goes shopping.
Xo's with Eldritch
Molly and I - and the Phantom Bobby - look into the missing knife
"Whatever took it got past the wards"
we warn Cross that there may be another attempt to steal the Dragon's Eye back home
The good news is Xo's not possessed
Eldritch suggests they need to refer Xo to someone more specialised in the field
She also suggests some control exercises
One of the other artefacts is in the lair of Dr Egypt, under the Great Pyramid
Phantom Bobby would like us to speak to Bulldog Smith
Smith is an exile from Faerie.
Small pub called The Willows
It's full of magic types
"Wolfy" is Mr Smith's gatekeeper
So wants Shock to be useful. Life is full of disappointments
Mr Smith will see us after closing
Molly identifies designs on the knife as like those of the alien race known as the Gir
The Gir are spiritual demon-fighters. Small and blue
No such designs on the Dragon Eye
We go see Smith to find out if it is a trap
Smith says "The Dark Cardinal" is behind all this
104
Danny's relationship with his mom isn't great
Kate's hair samples have arrived
Molly is researching the markings on the knife
Cromwell has good news and bad
Kate 3 is different to 1 and 2
1 and 2 are identical
None have demonic taint he can detect
Eldritch has been warning the other mages about the Cardinal
There may be a connection between Faerie and the Gir
Cardinal has a magic book - unprecedented summoning powers
Eldritch thinks we can work out the whole speaking in tongues thing
Suggests talking to Archangel about it
I ask AEGIS to find him and set up a meeting
Xo would like to re-consecrate Notre Dame after we deal with Cardinal
We approach Notre Dame through the Catacombs
Shock senses animal brain activity up ahead
They turn out to be about 40 Type 1 Demons
105
Megastar takes out 40 Type 1 Demons
Oh hey, tougher demons
But not that much tougher
Still, the Doom Pool is ugly
We sneak further in
It's all very spooky
Shock: "This is easy"
Which is when we hear ritual chanting
It's Cardinal Blood. Because he got a new name (or the writer is a hack)
He summons more Type 1s
And then puts the whammy on us
Or tries to, anyway
I remonstrate with him
He sets Xo on fire
And has annoying spoiler powers
But we make him doubt himself
Apparently Asmodeus does not approve
And drags him down to Hell
106
We arrive in Cairo. With Danny
Megastar is still working on the ship
We're here to see Dr Cairo
Danny offers Xo a ride in his limo
Oh, and the rest of us too
There are student demonstrations disrupting traffic
We chill at the hotel
Danny calls Xo: he is intimidated by his hotel
There are also students protesting there
Bear wants us to meet with Yusef Gabor
Wealthy philanthropist looking to use weather control for good
There are lots of young people with snake tattoos in protests
Symbol of the Sons of Set: Egyptian nationalists
I meet with Yusef - he expresses interest in working with Bear
He's having the kind of party that attracts supervillains
That night we go looking for Dr Cairo
There's a hole in his pyramid
And a dead person inside
Oh hey bad guys
We beat them up
107
Shock checks the bad guy for IS
His name is Yusef Hawaz
I call Eldritch
She suggests following up on Dr Cairo with antiquities dealers
Detective Nethe might know Dr Cairo
We call the cops
They take us to the station to make statements
They want to test Shock's swords
Shock makes this as difficult as possible
While we are there, a hostage incident takes place
The hostage takers want "The Boy"
We search for a pyramid and find a photo of a young man
Shock runs a search on the photo
Find locations the boy is often at
Xo and I try to mystic our way to him
It actually appears to work
We go there and find him
Mohammed Zahan
Bad guys have his wife
She is mystically warded
Xo goes to recon and her eyebrows go up
108
We're pandering to Furries
Crocovillian narrates nothing!
His curse of hunger doesn't go so well for him
Hippolady eats Shock - and not in the way Shock likes
We blind Hippolady to take her out of the fight
Xo frees Zahan's wife
We vacate the area
Xo treats Shock's injuries
Zahan has kept the Tooth of Set safe
But the bad guys have the Helm of Dr Cairo
Apparently this is far more dangerous
But we have guys on Viper flycycles to worry about first
And bombs with hostages attached to them
Zo and Megastar bash baddies while Shock and I deal with the bombs
That works surprisingly well
109
Viper dudes are being interrogated
The Helm being stolen is another "unprecedented mystical power" thing
Taken by an immortal named Pottifar
But he is probably not the originator of the scheme
Molly emails Moo-vel Girl. Moooo?
Viper guys mentions Yusef Gabor
Big storm
Oh hey Viper
We beat em up
The experiment appears successful
If a bit scary in how it operates
Gabor's all cranky
Danny's all clueless
We head back to Cairo PD
We meet The Scarab
He should be named The States The Obvious
110
Apparently I was somehow persuaded to let Shock scout Gabor's place
Along with Captain Obvious
Shock gets full schematics of the machine
They get out with only being shot at a little
We go find some terrorists to interrogate
"Daughter of the Cobra"
Temple west of the city
We sneak in through the air ducts
Badly
Shock and Scarab get separated from us
Megastar flashes some guards
We make lots of noise
LOTS OF NOISE
We find the Daughter of the Cobra
Meanwhile, Shock detects a large energy signature
And meets Hassan Chop
111
Shock tries to escape
Pottifar tries to stab her
It goes poorly for both
The daughter's goons get taken out fast
She meanwhile wants glorious battle
We don't really do glorious around here
It is not a good day to be the Daughter of the Cobra
And not much better to be the guy with the silly name
We take the helmet back to Zahar
"Dr Cairo Lives!"
112
We are in Dr Cairo's Not-Bat-Cave
We ask him about Xander Black
Black was asking him to search for misguided souls
They weren't able to locate any souls in the Underworld
Therefore anyone with no soul either lost it, had it stolen, or never had one
One of the three Kates has no soul
Wisdom of the Ancients pointed them to Katana and Amar Kabir
Kabir is an Indian mystic; expert in finding the truth
Artefact thefts: something ancient trying to break free
He suggests Xo talk to Tarot in SF
Xo calls Danny. He wants to see the Sphinx
Gabor's suddenly "the weather machine was a bad idea"
Danny wants Bear to encounrage Gabor otherwise
Xo goes out with Danny while I distract Kris
Molly follows a cat
Because of course she does
Now she is creepily surrounded by creepy cats of creepiness
Danny is going to Pakistan next. Of course
Molly and I look at churches. Many dogs follow us
Cows are waiting for us in Kashmir
Mooooooo
113
Molly talks to cows
Kris googles Amar Kabir
That doesn't get us very far so I use mystic dowsing
Mystic energy "that way"
I hear what sounds like someone beating up a tank
It's where the mystic energy is
Of course it is
Shock investigates
It's a 12 foot tall four armed elephant man
Not the David Lynch kind
He's fighting the Pakistani Army
We decide to be elsewhere until we can work out who he is and what he is doing
The GM's not gonna let that happen
Shock tricks the army into thinking they won.
We are all impressed (and surprised) by this plan
Elephant Man is a Lieutenant in the Indian Army
We go with him to his base
Where we get a more or less civil welcome
We agree to stay peacefully overnight
But it is becoming apparent we won't be allowed to continue our search
Elephant guy has met Xander Black
Elephant guy also deliberately gives us a chance to escape
Xo makes the most of the chance
We return to looking for Amar Kabir
114
Megastar is surrounded by cows
The cows don't seem to want to let her leave.
But she can fly
She calls us and arranges to meet up.
Ship's sensors don't work in the area where we are heading
And there is a weird tasting mist. Possibly Sierra.
Megastar makes a big glow
Which reveals lots of spiders watching her
After a while they stop following us
There is nothing living here - plant or animal
There's a portal ahead that might lead to a different dimension
I go through first to check if it is safe
It's a weird, strange metaphysical plane. He said redundantly.
It is Amir Kabir
Xo's tentacles don't want her to go into the portal
Something tries to read my mind. Which is quite impolite.
Shock comes through despite not hearing from me
Naturally, this starts a fight
(It's not actually her fault)
It's actually a rakshasa, who has likely killed the real Kabir
Fighty fight fight
We win. There are floating stairs now.
115
There is no electricity here
Megastar's lights look more vivid than usual
We try going up the stairs
They seem to stretch into infinity and then vanish behind us
We go "Further up and farther in"
Eventually we meet a lion-tailed monkey in a pinstripe suit and a cravat
His name is Sanjay
Kabir is "presently deceased"
However, his soul has been trapped on the far side of "The Breach" by a monster
So we should probably do something about that
"Women don't owe you dates just because you stop the apocalypse"
We find a tentacle-y, mouthy thing
Clearly our writer has just discovered Lovecraft
Iai! Iai! C'thulhu fhtagn!
Worst Elder God since the end of Hellboy
116
We need to wait 24 hours for Kabir to recover
Xo gets a phone message from Danny: "911 please call"
He has been kidnapped. Thereby justifying his narrative existence.
Shock tracks the signal from Danny's phone
Bear gives us a lead on someone who can provide a fake ransom: William
We plan to drop off the fake ransom then follow whoever picks it up
A super-speedster comes for the bag
This does not go so well for him
There are more bad guys
Xo touches one of them with her noodly appendage
That guy has a major seizure
All four of them are messed up with some kind of drug
Xo looks after them until AEGIS can arrive
Shock and I track the phone to an abandoned medical facility
There's an evil spider monkey controlling these guys
If the writer was not a hack, this would be Monkey On Your Back
And now he has a human on his back
117
We've dropped all that Kabir stuff, it seems. Japan time!
Oh. Dream sequence / Hallucinogenic villain / Somesuch.
Megastar is with Moo-vel Girl
No-one else is around and her phone doesn't work.
Xo is in a Parisian shoe shop
I investigate the source of a flood of refugees
It's Shadow Warriors. I grab one
Megastar tries to leave the lab and meets Robyn
Robyn from a world where Kris is not a walking romantic disaster
Megastar is suspicious of Robyn's desire for the wifi password
Xo works out she is in a dream, right before Danny turns up
Danny remembers being rescued, and doesn't know how he got to Paris
Apparently I'm up against the Thunderer
I try to head up the mountain: Ninjas attack to use up a page
Xo is still weirded out
Either we are all strung out on the monkey's mojo (jojo) or this is something to do with Sanjay
Xo's tentacles are being a little overly friendly
Further up the mountain is a statue of Sanjay
Moo-vel Girl's mind machine lets Megastar text Xo and vice versa
Xo tries to connect everyone with the magics. Including Danny
Xo's room service is a monkey
We collectively touch our monkeys
I tune in to Sanjay
We've been caught up in the psychic backwash from Kabir's reincarnation
Shock is cocooned for her own protection
She is drawing some of her energy from a primitive entity named Raiden
She has drawn us into it to help her
I go back to where I started. There are a lot of ninja
118
Awesome was busy elsewhere.
Valkyrie turned up.
Made-up Moo-Vel Girl died.
119
Awesome be fighting ninjas. But then the ninjas stop moving.
All but one disappear.
Shock ends up in the mind of that last ninja.
Sanjay calls. Everything is bad. Bad things. Bad.
We try to track Megastar through her phone.
This works. In as much as we find a dead cow and Megastar's phone.
Shock ignores the exposition.
We go to Pacific Vision Labs.
Something is very wrong in Bear's Lab.
Robyn is trying to break into the computers
We stop her and Shock kicks Megastar out of her mind
I magically track the Spear of Odin
We end up in Shock's bedroom when she was 13
Raiden is here
Fight time. Our secret weapon is water.
And furniture.
We win the fight and return to the real world.
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